Feeling very cross today

Am feeling very cross today. I am so fed up with hearing about breast cancer….it’s as if women only get cancer there. I was watching the Kylie interview on Sunday and got really cross with her as well! She looked wonderful but then so could we all given the team of make up etc she no doubt has; she chose to have her chemotherapy in Paris and looked out of her window to see the Eifel Tower sparking and she said she thought it was sparking just for her ( oh perwease….if I look out of my window at 9.30pm I can see the street light sparkling but I think in reality it is merely flickering as the bulb tries to kick into action!). She was saying that she took a year out as soon as she was diagnosed and that made me cross as well (!) she obviously had no worries about being put on half pay after a certain length of time………..gosh I do sound like a crotchety old bag don’t I?

I just thought about all the ‘ordinary people’ who have to carry on working and coping with daily family life as normally as they can whilst coping with all the treatment and the vile side effects, and that the options open to her are actually so far removed from most of us, I found it very hard to even relate to what she was saying.

Sorry about that….I needed to vent my anger and I feel better now!!!!!

I am so not liking the excessive heat this week although I have managed to go to work just for the mornings and then I am coming home and lying on my bed with the fan on and having a sleep – lovely. Hope you are all coping with these high temperatures and I expect, like me, looking forward to the weather breaking soon.

Today I've had my summer holiday!

I promise this won't be a daily diary because that would be so boring....but Ihad to chuckle today. One of the treatments I am having is relaxation therapy and I went for a session this afternooon. Well........ I have already been told that I wasn't to go abroard this year for a holiday to anywhere hot because of the effects of the chemotherapy, although I'm sure they hadn't bargained on such high temperatures on the Costa del Morden. My therapist was doing ' guided visualisation' with me today and I was in a reclining chair with my eyes shut listening to a CD of the sea, all very relaxing ( which was the whole point so it works!). She guided me to imagine I was in a cottage by the sea and then I went down some steps and felt the sand in my toes, I then dipped my feet in the water (no 'bloody hell that was cold' so obviously a dream!)and then I slowly came back to the cottage. And that, was the nearest I will come this year to a summer holiday!!!!!!!!! The best thing about that holiday was that there were no flights, I just closed my eyes and I was there and I never spent any money!

Ug's away

Welcome to my new venture. I thought this would be easier to update everyone and hopefully I may have some fun doing it as well.

For those who are confused about my blog addy, I have named my tumour Ug which stands for 'Uninvited Guest' since I certainly did not give it permission to lodge itself in my body. A friend of mine, on hearing it's name thought that Ug should be as in 'ly bastard' and I have to say I rather like that one!

The year so far has been such a roller coaster and most of you will have read my updates as I've gone along but to re-cap I've had:~

1st 12 weeks - daily injections to thin the blood (most given by Amy, she was a star to do that for me); weekly intravenous anti- body drips; every 3rd week a chemotherapy drip as well; a cocktail of tablets (sometimes up to 20 a day) and as for the side effects of all this..... they were vile.

Next 6weeks after the above - daily radiotherapy; weekly anti body drip + tablets again.

Where I am at the moment - not drips, no radiotherapy, no tablets.....hoorah!!!! This is to give my body a chance to settle down before the surgery to remove Ug (hence "Ug's away") which is scheduled for 15th August. I do have a variety of hospital appointments with my surgeon etc in between now and then but am enjoying the break from my daily visits to the Royal Marsden Hospital { known with affection as my country residence}.

I have had the last 2 weeks off work as the radiotherapy made me very tired but am back now just for the mornings, there really is only so much daytime television I can take! Prior to that I have managed to work for part of the days that I have not been attending appointments. After this week I have taken a weeks leave and am going to spend a few days with my sister Sue in north Yorkshire, travelling with my best friend Carol and am so looking forward to that, I am hoping to recharge the batteries before going into hospital.

Will close for now, feeling very proud of myself for setting up this site, with grateful thanks to Liz (xxx)